


Til We're Nothing and No One

by seventhTense



Series: Love in the Modern Day, the Modern Way [1]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Bonding, Brief Implied Homophobia, Friendship and loneliness, Impulsive Sex, Kink Discoveries, M/M, Probably Unrealistic Flexibility, Smut and Fluff, implied depression, tired boys who don't give a fuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-05
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:21:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21682138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seventhTense/pseuds/seventhTense
Summary: Akira discovers that he and Goro are pretty unhealthy, mentally speaking. Akira discovers that he and Goro are pretty lonely, romantically speaking. Akira discovers that he and Goro are pretty inexperienced, sexually speaking.Akira and Goro decide to change two of those things.
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Amamiya Ren, Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Series: Love in the Modern Day, the Modern Way [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1661041
Comments: 11
Kudos: 175





	Til We're Nothing and No One

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this after listening to [ Mother Mother's "Modern Love," ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFXR5KWaV7w) for the first time in a long time, and getting big Akeshu vibes, then writing this on impulse for two hours. I'd recommend giving it a listen, if not while reading this then definitely soon after.
> 
> In addition to the tags, small, more specific warning for Akira discovering he has a scent kink (among other discoveries,) and some brief ass-eating. If you find that gross, be careful!
> 
> Enjoy~

It didn’t take Akira very long to realize that he and Goro were not exactly the... healthiest of people.

From Goro’s first visit to Leblanc, standing just slightly behind and to the side of Sae Nijima, Akira could tell that the young man held a lot of hidden, seething depth to him. The way his smile was oh-so perfect, but his nostrils flared out when Sae said something he disagreed with. The way he’d tighten his grip on his briefcase, then open his mouth to give a polite, carefully-worded, soothing addition to her threats against Sojiro. Akira stood near his guardian all the while, casually cleaning a mug, letting the very capable owner of the cafe handle all of this, knowing both that Sojiro could take on a whole platoon of cops if he had to, and that Akira could not mentally handle another potentially-jailing encounter with an authority figure without snapping.

When Sae left and Goro stayed behind, Akira softly suggested to Sojiro to go home and check on whoever Nijima had been threatening to take away from him, or rather he whispered cockily while eyeing Akechi that he’d like to handle this one, test his coffee skills out for real, and Sojiro gruffly-but-eagerly leapt at the opportunity to bail and rush home. 

The two made idle conversation, toeing the waters that they had first explored all too briefly at the TV studio, weeks before. Goro kept his mask on pretty securely that day, though Akira made certain to keep his eyes open for any other physical tics the detective might have, and jotted each down in the back of his head. It continued like this for the next couple visits Akechi made to Leblanc, at first only once a week, but coming more and more frequently as time went on, and his conversations with Akira deepened.

They’d talk idly about school, the city, nice restaurants and coffee shops, until they discovered a shared passion for philosophy and politics, and playing the devil’s advocate to each other’s beliefs on the subjects. 

It didn’t take long after that for Goro’s mask to start slipping off more and more. 

Sometimes, they’d be discussing the idea of family, and right after rebuking Akira’s point with a lengthy summation of this Roman philosopher or that classic Japanese text, Goro would suddenly start talking bitterly about his own experiences with so-called 'families,’ and how fragile they could be, and how little it took for the lies of unconditional love towards your children and parents to dissipate into fog and toxins. Sometimes they’d have a talk about the latest political scandal that the news station Sojiro liked to leave on wouldn’t stop talking about, and Akechi’s smile would slip, and he’d look down into his coffee for a few minutes, and the most unimaginably tired expression would distort his face, would make the shadows under his eyes starkly prominent under his flaking concealer, would make the tremble in his fingers from too little sleep and too much caffeine all the more apparent, would make the pain and shame and frustration in his eyes shine as bright as his smile would on his endless TV interviews.

Akira was no stranger to the telltale signs that somebody was fucked-up inside, that a combination of their own mistakes and the bitch of a planet they lived on had broken their bones and set them back wrong. Every disapproving look and disparaging word his parents had given him over the years, every bark of harsh laughter from his teachers and sneers of disgust from his so-called friends at his old school, every uncaring, emotionless word from the prosecutors at his assault trial and passionless, practically non-existent defense offered by his excuse of an attorney, every barely-whispered rumor at Shujin, every sneer from Kamoshida and gloat from Madarame and taunt from Kaneshiro, all had lacerated through his skin and scooped out chunk after chunk of his heart until he could feel the scars and the voids whenever he closed his eyes and pretended to sleep at Morgana’s behest each night. Eventually, he started talking about his past too, just short, brief recounts of bullshit he’d gone through, slipped unintentionally into the conversation, but each time it happened, he saw Akechi’s eyes open a little wider, his posture relax a little more, and Akira realized that maybe letting down your defenses with someone was a cooperative thing, like a detente between two warring nations, neither willing to dispose of their missiles and armies until the other did too.

Akira saw himself in Akechi, and maybe Akechi saw himself in Akira as well. A few short weeks passed, and their conversations across the bar turned to conversations in one of the booths, turned to conversations on the lumpy couch in the attic, turned to hours of idle, drifting thoughts and bitterly funny posts shared from their phones as they layed, sprawled out on Akira’s bed, limbs draped lazily over each other.

It should have been harder, some part of Akira thought, to get Goro to lower his walls to this point, but maybe the detective, the teenage boy wearing the trenchcoat and stained loafers of a career cop three times his age, had been looking for an excuse to just give up the act for a long, long time now. A chance, any chance, to just not give a fuck, for a few hours here and there, at least.

And again, it didn’t take long, barely a week and a half of lounging about in Akira’s attic like this every other day or so, for the boys to grow even closer still.

It went like this: Akechi was laying almost-properly on Akira’s bed, his head on the pillow, a book held in his hands, his legs propped up at an angle. Akira was laying wholly inappropriately, his torso beneath Akechi’s legs, his head dangling off the edge of the bed, his legs sprawled up at odd angles on the surface of his window. They had been lying like that for a few hours now, Akechi reading, Akira scrolling through his phone and tapping through gatcha games, and Akira’s neck was definitely hurting by now, but it was hot, and he couldn’t be assed to move, and honestly, who gave a fuck anyways?

Akechi lowered his book, layed it splayed-out on his sternum, and asked to the open air, not looking directly at Akira, “Kurusu-kun, have you ever had sex?”

Akira almost fell off the bed- almost took Akechi with him, but was saved by his legs tangling awkwardly with Goro’s, and after half a minute of struggling, they both managed to pull Akira back into a disheveled sitting position. He blinked at Akechi, still a little shocked. “...wha?”

Goro was laying back down, looking a little grumpy that he had to move to help Akira in the first place, which Akira thought was adorable, and just repeated himself, not sounding bothered by the subject matter he was broaching. “I asked if you had ever had sex before.”

“Uh,” Akira replied intelligently, scratching at his jaw. “Goro, I’ve only ever had real friends since I moved to Tokyo.” 

Goro waved vaguely. “You don’t need to have friends to have sex, Kurusu-kun. And even if you did, you’ve been here for a number of months already, that’s plenty of time for your relationship with one of your cadre of acquaintances to evolve to that point.”

“I mean, you’re not wrong,” Akira hemmed. “But the last thing those people were gonna offer me back in my town was casual sex, and I don’t think any of the guys I know now think of me that way.”

A raised eyebrow from the detective. “And the girls?”

Akira just scratched his neck awkwardly, looking out the window at the slowly fading light of the sun. “There’s a reason the kids back home hated me, I guess.”

Goro seemed to take the hint, a barely audible “Ah,” leaving his lips.

There was a pause, then Akira tried shakily to break from the flashes of memory he had gotten caught up in and rejoin the present. “What about you?”

“Have I ever had sex? No, I, ah...” A bit of embarrassment finally seemed to sneak through his defenses. “It’s the same problem, I suppose. Everyone I met before hated me, of course, and now, well...” He looked ruefully at Akira’s sheets. “Frankly, you’re the first person I’ve met that I’d consider, Kurusu-kun. Certainly the first person who’s... well, bothered to get to know me beyond a surface level. I’d considered looking for something casual, when my fame started rising, but something...” His gaze shifted from the sheets to the stars, but he was looking inside, not at anything, really. “...I’ve given so much of myself up already. There’s only so many pieces I still have a hold of, all to myself. What’s left of my heart, what’s left unstained on my body... I didn’t want to give those up too.”

The air hung stagnant between them for a minute, for two, the only movement Akira’s hand, instinctively going to Goro’s knee and moving in slow, thoughtless motions. Then the tension got too much for Akira to bear, and he broke the silence. “So, not to discount the rest of that, but...” He got red in the face, buried his gaze in the sheets. “Did I hear right that you said you’d... considered me, sexually?” 

Akira’s eyes flitted up, eager and desperate to catch Goro’s response, and the boy had the decency at least to blush at that. “Well... I’d think it rather natural for me to. When someone makes their first real... real friend after nearly two decades of solitude, it’s only logical to start thinking of that person in extremes, or at the very least in all the ways one can be close to another... wouldn’t you say, Kurusu-kun?”

Akira’s smile grew the more Goro spoke, until it was a sharp, curled thing. He rose his head up a little, leaned forwards, and poked at Goro’s arm. “You know, if you’re gonna proposition someone for sex, you probably oughta call them by their first name, Goro~”

That got him an eye roll and a sound whack on the arm, and he leaned back, laughing. “Ugh, you have a point, K- _Akira,_ ” Goro huffed. “I suppose.”

His laughs subsided slowly, and he gazed fondly towards his friend- or whatever categorization of relationship they were approaching now. “What brought this on?”

Goro thought for a moment, then gestured to his book. “A lot of things over time, I suppose, but mostly the book I’ve been reading. It’s a modern fiction- I don’t usually go for that sort of thing, but this one... intrigued me. It’s about a corrupt Private Eye, who causes half the crimes she ends up solving, always pinning it on some random criminal. She meets this mysterious man, an anarchist, whose crimes are so wide-spread and purely destructive that she can’t drum up enough evidence to bring him down, and she doesn’t want to anyways, because over time they build up a rapport, a rivalry- a friendship, even. But, they’re still at odds, professionally, so there’s always this tension between them, a tension that often boils over into... well, remarkably lurid and depraved sex scenes, to put it plainly.” He’s a little flushed now, running his fingers over the cover and spine of the book. Akira’s mind is spinning a mile a minute, catching paralells and connecting dots, thinking of Morgana and pancake-shaped buildings at dome town, and how Akechi’s never let him see the home screen of his phone, or search through his apps, and how-

-but Akechi keeps talking, and his words are far more interesting than Akira’s fears. “At any rate, I’ve become quite invested in the story, to my surprise, and it got me thinking about... sex.” His gaze drifts again, settling on a spot on the wall and inside his head all at once. “It’s never been something I’ve given much thought to- never something I expected to happen to me within my time on this cursed planet. But... that said, I have had some thoughts, now and then, about things I might enjoy trying... might enjoy feeling. And I thought... it wouldn’t be so bad, feeling them with you.”

He looked suddenly, defenselessly into Akira’s eyes, and Akira’s heart stopped, became useless, because all the blood in his system was flowing all on its own, rushing through every vein and capillary in his body like lightening, like fire, like poison and pure endorphins and what he imagined hard drugs would feel like. His mouth moved, without thinking, and he said “...Sojiro left, like, an hour ago... if you wanted to... try feeling some of those things now...”

Neither of them moved, then they both moved at once, Goro tossing his book across the room, Akira tossing his sheets to bunch up against the wall, both of them moving forwards and grasping the other’s jaw, their lips meeting in a heated, desperate kiss that they moaned into with equal force. It felt inevitable, it felt like a release of what had been building up for weeks and years, and like something new was building up to replace it, something better, something hungry, something to fill all the empty places inside them.

Their kiss turned deeper, hotter, tongues and teeth and bites and nails digging into each other’s shoulders and arms as they tried to grapple each other’s clothes off clumsily, not giving a shit for how clumsy it was, just needing more, needing touch, contact, heat. They had only been dressed lightly anyways, Goro having long since given up the pretense of keeping his button-ups and sweatervests on when he came up to Akira’s room, trading them for whatever clean t-shirt Akira had that day. Their lips parted for only the second and a half it took for the fabric to pass over their heads, then dove furiously back to meet each other again. They shifted and pushed and kicked at their pants, managing somehow to get them off without having to break the kiss- but then Akechi broke the kiss anyways, halfway through kicking his slacks off the mattress, fumbling for them and digging into the pockets, until he victoriously pulled out a couple of packets of lube, the kind you’d tear open and slather on, and a **_lot_ **of thoughts and questions sprung into Akira’s head, only to be chased out seconds later when he was flipped over onto his back, and Goro’s lips were at his again, and Goro’s chest was on his again, and Goro’s cock ground against his again through the rapidly-dampening fabric of their briefs.

As the heat in their loins grew, their mouths soon slipped from each other, Akira’s going down to Goro’s neck, then Goro’s sliding down to Akira’s chest, nipping and biting and sucking at everything he could get his mouth on. Akira moaned at the hot wetness on him, at the sharp tingles spreading through his body from the attention, then blinked as they suddenly vanished. Goro darted up towards the box that served as Akira’s bedside table, grabbed one of the lube packets he had tossed there, and clambered around, shifting until he was straddling Akira backwards, his knees under Akira’s armpits, his head above Akira’s crotch, which was quickly disrobed as Goro shoved his underwear down, Akira’s subconscious helpfully lifting up his hips so Goro could get the damp fabric over the swell of Akira’s ass.

Goro seemed to freeze for a moment as Akira’s cock met open air, the hot pants of his breath ghosting over the tip, and Akira made a soft, deep noise at the sensation, which seemed to be enough to snap Goro out of whatever trance he had fallen into. Desperately, he dove down, taking Akira into his mouth, his tongue laving over every pictometer of cock it could reach, desperate to taste, to _feel_. Akira let out a high gasp, then a deep moan at the mass of sensations coursing through him all at once. He bucked his hips up unconsciously, which drove his cock further into Goro’s mouth- too far, he suddenly worried, desperation to not do anything wrong screaming into his brain, only to be chased out as he _felt_ Goro _moan_ at the feeling of the cock sliding into his throat.

The back of Akira’s brain, the bit that could still manage to think, realized slowly that in order to not instantly choke, Goro would have had to have practiced at this somehow, and vague flashes of imagined imagery, of Goro and his vast collection of sex toys, of him taking silicone dick into his mouth and pushing it farther, bit by bit, until he could fit it in all the way to the base- images dispersed as quickly as they came as Goro did exactly that with Akira’s actual dick. He moaned out Goro’s name, then a louder, impassioned “Fuck!” Goro made that noise again around Akira, and he pressed his head further into the pillow, his hips further up into Goro.

But they both wanted more, and they knew it.

As Goro swallowed and suckled at Akira, hands digging like claws into Akira’s thighs, Akira desperately tugged at Goro’s briefs, the detective’s hips right above Akira’s head. They slid down without resistance, and Akira marveled at the sight of Akechi’s hard-on, dangling above him, just out of reach, the tip slick and shiny with pre-come, twitching with pleasure at the pressure and taste taking up all of Goro’s attention. 

Roughly, demandingly, Akira pushed at Akechi’s legs, pulled at his hips, until they slipped and fell down onto Akira’s face, and Goro let out a surprised noise around Akira. He seemed surprised, distressed, and Akira was too a little bit, as Akechi hadn’t fallen quite as perfectly as Akira had imagined, his balls resting on the bridge of Akira’s nose, making him close his eyes, his cock pressed up at an angle across his lips. But Akira’s hindbrain quickly took over all conscious thought, as the most intense, pure _Goro_ smell overwhelmed every other sense in his body, barely winning out over the bursts and waves of pleasure coming from down south.

Akira had, somewhat guiltily, taken the shirts he loaned to Goro, long after Goro had redressed into his formalwear, and pressed them to his face deep in the middle of the night, letting himself get drunk with the smell of his crush. 

This was so, so much more. The smell of skin and sweat, _so much_ sweat, and come, and **_Goro_ _,_** it was all almost too much, tripping deftly across the line between sickening and heavenly, until Akira’s brain grew a new gnarled, perverted twist in it, and the line disappeared entirely, sickening and heavenly merging and melding together into all the same thing. All at once, he couldn’t get enough, and a growl vibrated in his chest as he opened his mouth, tongue darting out to lave over all of Goro he could reach, unable to take him into his mouth, but pressing and running and stroking against everything he could manage.

Goro _very much liked that,_ from the chest-deep moan that rumbled and caressed against Akira’s dick, and soon Goro had to pull off of it entirely, driven to pants and rough, ragged noises. He started shifting his hips, dragging his cock and balls all over Akira’s face, Akira chasing after them mindlessly with his mouth, what scraps of conscious thought were left demanding that he have that taste, that smell, that _feeling_ again, as much as he could, _more, more, **more.**_

Akechi shifted his hips more drastically, and Akira whined as Goro’s junk moved out of reach, but only briefly, as they were soon replaced by Akechi’s quickly-approaching ass. On instinct, Akira’s hands moved up to grope, to squeeze and squish at his plump cheeks, then to spread them apart as they lowered further, revealing a pink, wet-looking hole, a little loose, skin pale enough to have been obviously, vigorously cleaned before Goro had come over.

Akira didn’t resist as lowered onto his face, and his tongue darted out again, licking against and around Akechi’s entrance, then, as Goro moaned and swore oaths on Akira’s name, it almost instantly relaxed, loosened, and Akira’s tongue slipped inside.

Akechi rode Akira’s face like his life depended on it, head tossed back, crying out at the sensations running rampant through him. Akira’s tongue moved a certain way, his lips, or some part of him brushed up against a certain spot, and Goro’s eyes snapped open, the fire within him shooting up, demanding to be fed. With surprising strength, Goro reached and grabbed onto Akira’s hips, lifting them up off the bed and towards his face, and with surprising flexibility, Akira’s body complied, spine flexing and legs curling until only his shoulders remained on the mattress, head still buried between Akechi’s buns, crotch now level with Akechi’s face. Goro dove in again eagerly, not taking Akira in this time, but licking and sucking against all he could reach, the head of Akira’s dick, his shaft, laving at his balls, sucking hickies into his thighs. 

Akira moaned into Goro’s ass just as Goro had moaned around Akira’s dick before, and the sensation only seemed to encourage Goro further, prompting him to let go with one hand, slap around the bed blindly until he reached the packet of lube he had grabbed earlier, then brought it up and tore it open, letting it pour out onto Akira, right between his sack and his ass. Goro smeared his fingers into a glob of the stuff, shoving them down between Akira’s cheeks and pressing them against his hole, rubbing around it before roughly pressing a finger inside.

Another twist curled into existence in Akira’s brain, and with a newfound masochistic streak, he gasped, then moaned right from the deepest part of his chest. His fingers squeezed roughly into Goro’s cheeks, and his head lolled back onto the sheets beneath him. 

Goro started thrusting his finger into Akira, but tossed a look down at him, barked out a desperate, needy “No! Back, put it, put _something_ in me, no!”

From Goro’s lips to Akira’s brain, the thief obeyed instantly, slapping around towards his side table and grabbing another packet of the lube. He tore it open as well, sloppily, unpracticed, some going onto his chest, and dipped his fingers messily inside, taking out as much as he could, slathering his fingers in it as much as he could, then reaching up to press them against Akechi.

A bit of pressure, and two fingers slipped easily inside Goro, sliding in to the base without any effort at all. To the sound of Goro’s deep, increasingly unhinged moan, a fragment of Akira thought of dildos of absurd size, and Goro sliding down onto them with impossible ease, then Goro thrust a second finger into Akira, and the pain and the pleasure reduced his mind to liquid, and then boiled it into steam as they found his prostate, and started thrusting into it over and over.

Self-control gone, Akira pulled his fingers out to the tips, then added a third and dove them back into Akechi, starting to thrust into him with wild, untamed abandon. Goro’s moans got higher and higher as the thrusts got faster and rougher, Akira’s panting and moaning rising and rising in volume until it practically rang off the walls. Akechi canted his hips back, pressing into Akira’s thrusts, and his dick trailed back to poke and prod at Akira’s lips again, hard as a rock, flushed and shiny and ready to burst. 

Mindlessly, Akira took it in his mouth at the same time as he thrust into Akechi, and that was enough to break the dam. Akechi cried out, sharp and bright and broken, and slammed his fingers into Akira over and over and over to the rhythm of his cock shooting pump after pump of cum into Akira’s mouth, and then Akira saw white, and then he saw nothing at all.

\--

It was deep into the night when Akira awoke, the light of the moon and the streetlamps casting an ethereal white glow over his and Akechi’s bodies. They were tangled haphazardly in the sheets, Akechi’s face by Akira’s feet, the detective’s arms curled around Akira’s legs, his chest shiny and coated in lines of drying cum. Akira wasn’t conscious enough to process much about his own state, but was correct to vaguely assume that it was along the same lines. 

Lurching, he pushed himself up with one arm, and, the one thought in his head that Akechi would be much more comfortable if he was holding onto Akira properly, he grabbed and tugged and pushed at Akechi until the other boy was aligned correctly, his head on the pillow next to Akira, grumbling wordlessly at being moved, but too drained to return to consciousness despite the movement.

Akira snuggled up to Goro, and wrapped his arms around him, and pressed their stained and sticky chests together, and pressed their foreheads softly against one another, and left a soft, small kiss on Goro’s slightly-parted lips, and smiled, and fell back asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> I had intended, while writing, for this to turn into a short 3-5 chapter series about Akira and Goro being unhealthy and sexy together, with some plot stuff sprinkled in, but never got back to it. If you'd be interested in seeing this continue, lemme know in the comments, and I'll whip something up and tack it on, make this a series.
> 
> [[[EDIT: This fic has a sequel now! It's right over here, entitled [ 'True, True, I Fell Into You,' ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23120524/chapters/55321837) and I hope you'll enjoy it! Also, bc it was asked in the comments, and also by my s/o when they read this, I totally made up the book Goro references here, but it is a fun idea for a novel, isn't it? Maybe someday... though if I wrote it, it definitely wouldn't be straight. Still!]]]
> 
> Next update for my longfic, [ 'Like The Moon,' ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21227510) is next Thursday, 12/12, and if you'd like to see more frequent updates about my writing progress, or just me talking about video games a lot, my twitter is [ @SevventhSteen! ](https://twitter.com/SevventhSteen)
> 
> See ya soon!


End file.
